New year resolutions in the palace

This is the first time the One Who Types has agreed to write in my blog this year. She is trying my patience.

Here are the new year resolutions of all the palace dwellers:

Fairbanks: To spend more time outside and to improve his hunting skills

Even when he looks like he's resting,
Fairbanks is secretly planning his next hunt.

Also, I think he secretly resolved to push Clara the Cow out a window, but he won't say if that was on his list or not.

Clara the Cow: To get plenty of beauty sleep

Although she has, indeed, slept a lot since the beginning of the year, I'd say her resolution was actually to invade everyone else's personal space at all times, because that's what she's been doing.

Here, Fairbanks and I were taking a perfectly pleasant nap,
and Clara had to stuff her giant cow body into our space.

Katherine: To figure out how to open cans of squishy food and treat bags

This has been Katherine's resolution every year since I've known her. So far, she has failed miserably, which is not surprising, since she's so stupid. I can open cans of squishy food and treat bags, but I don't do it because I am the queen and such menial tasks are beneath me.

I'm pretty sure she's mentally ill. Seriously. Look at her.

My stupid brother Nick: Nick didn't make any resolutions because he didn't want to commit to something that might infringe upon someone else's resolution and ruin it for him or her. He's an idiot.

It's a good thing I didn't allow Nick to take the throne.
The kingdom would be in ruins by now.

The One Who Types: To eat less, shop less, and find a job doing something she's passionate about

Clearly, her priorities need to be reevaluated. Note that "type her majesty's blog daily" is not on that list. Uncool.

Queen Nora Charles: I have no need of resolutions. I am already perfect. [Editor's note: stop laughing - she's serious.]