Friday, June 3, 2016

Nick defends himself . . . I think.

My stupid brother Nick was interrogated today regarding the mouse massacre that occurred the other night. Nick said he thought it went well. I'll let you be the judge.

Transcript of Nick Charles Interrogation
Conducted 6/3/16

The One Who Types: Nick, do you know why you're being interrogated?

Nick: Somebody finally found my tail?

TOWT: No. This is about all those dead mice that were found in and around the palace the other night.

Nick: What mice?

TOWT: The dead ones. You remember – you were lying a foot and a half from one of them. Upstairs? In the bathroom?

Nick: Are you calling me a liar?

TOWT: No. I'm trying to find out who killed all those mice.

Nick: What mice?

TOWT: Here's a picture of two of them. These were found by the laundry room door. Did you put them there?

Mouse Massacre victims

Nick: Where did those mice come from?

TOWT: I was trying to find out if you put them there.

Nick: I've never seen those mice before. Maybe Fairbanks put them there.

TOWT: What about the one upstairs?

Nick: Is there a picture of that one?

Mouse victim #3

Nick: There's no dirt like that upstairs.

TOWT: The picture was taken after I moved the mouse to its final resting place.

Nick: If it's only resting, why am I in trouble?

TOWT: You're not in trouble. I just want to know who killed all the mice.

Nick: What mice?

TOWT: This interview is over. Thank you for your time.

Nick: Can I have a treat?

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